Attachment is the source of all suffering “ – Buddha

Our ego grabs onto anything it can, looking for things to identify itself with.  The more things it can attach itself too, the happier it becomes.  Attachment is a survival mechanism developed in early infancy, designed originally to aid a baby with creating separation from its mother.

As we move through life, we develop emotional attachments with different things. We become attached to the monetary things we acquire. We become attached to certain relationships. We become attached to what we see in the mirror every morning (at least when we like what we are seeing).  All these attachments provide our egos with a sense of identity.

When we lose these things, or they change in a way we don’t like, we experience suffering. Naturally, our ego wants to hold on to these things that it identifies itself with.  When they are gone, it hurts. We feel loss.  Our natural inclination is to then hold onto these things, creating an attachment.  We may feel like our current lifestyle will never be as good as the one we lost.

For years I was attached to this self created concept of what I thought my life was supposed to look like.  I felt pain for years, holding on tight to this mental attachment. Instead of embracing my current life, I looked backwards creating regret and anger.  

To then deepen my pain, I then began to attach myself to things in the external world, looking to build a sense of identity – money, relationships, work, accomplishments…I looked everywhere for validation, but the very place I should’ve been looking. Inside.

Anytime too much of our identity gets tied up with external things, we are setting ourselves up for disaster.  Self worth is an inside job. I learned this the hard way, but what a blessing this lesson was in retrospect.  

Who’s to say losing your job might not be the best thing that ever happened to you? Or, you suffer a failed relationship that may actually open the door for you to meet someone even better!  Attachments prevent us from growing and becoming the person God wants us to be.  

All you can do is control your effort and attitude, you cannot control outcomes.  Live free.  Take a deep breathe and smile, your life is unfolding just as it’s supposed to.  


Grab coffee or drinks with a great friend one night(or two). Turn off the phone and just laugh a lot.  Celebrate the fact that, regardless of what happens next, life is going to work out just as it’s supposed to. Chill and enjoy the ride.

That’s all I got for this week (sometimes the creative juices just don’t flow!). Make it a great week!


Do something incredible

Give something incredible 

Create something incredible 

Live Simple. Live with Klarity

Matt Miller
Author: Matt Miller

Matt Miller has done many things in his young addition to just surviving. In 2002, Matt left behind person he once was as his life was suddenly changed forever by a horrendous mountain climbing accident. Diving for his falling father, Matt fell over 4,000 feet before miraculously stopping just short of the ragid cliffs. Through a night of survival and pain, Matt persevered but lost most of his fingers and toes as a result from frostbite. Matt does everything from public speaking, one-on-one consulting, firm strategy, as well as company retreat facilitation. With a seasoned investment background and passion for educating the investment world, Matt also can't resist sharing his comments from time to time on markets. Matt is also an avid runner, successfully completing over 10 marathons without his toes! He is 38 and resides in Phoenix, Arizona.


  1. Beth t on March 5, 2019 at 7:32 am

    Every time you post something I feel it is “just for me” (selfishly). U are truly inspiring so many Matt!! Love your affirmations!!!! My autoimmune diseases make me sometimes forget my self worth because of what I see on the outside. So thank u for this amazing reminder of not being blind to those things. By knowing my self worth and be who God creates!!!! Beth-

  2. janespannagelhotmailcom on March 5, 2019 at 11:15 pm

    Beautifully said Matt and so very true.


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